behold, a nonsense

[redthedragon]

please enjoy this very silly two panel comic i done drew today




I saw a picture of the typo version of the shirt on tumblr here and I could not rest until I drew some kind of joke with it. the original quote is from Conan the Barbarian, I think? no idea.

ok ok because this is My Blog i will add a bajillion headcanons and nonsense under the cut

- Drag Strip has heelie wheels in those shoes. Consequently, he eats shit every time he tries to walk anywhere. He will not change shoes.
- Wildrider is the person fighting with Drag Strip. Wildrider is just having fun. Shoutout to wildrider. we should all aspire to be more like this gigachad broguy
- Swindle is selling drugs but all of them are cut with baby formula, salt or oregano. if pressed, he says his "secret formula" gives it "extra kick" (it does not.)
- Onslaught has been awake for seventeen hours straight and is sick of everyone's nonsense. he is ready for death to take him. please. he is so done
- Blast Off is somewhere in the distance staring at Onslaught like he's seen something particularly disagreeable on the bottom of his foot. Everyone around him is edging away convinced he's about to start swinging. This is Blast Off's "genuinely stricken with lovestruck affection" face. he has no idea it looks like this
- Dead End is trying to figure out how hard it would be to think himself to death in the middle of a meeting. He does this regularly. You could not pay him enough money to pay any attention. He's also wearing a suit. This is because if he has to show up he might as well look pretty.
- Vortex hashtag genderqueer hashtag icon hashtag the tits come off but he figures Motormaster will take extra offense at a) his pectorals being usurped in the t shirt and b) the implication that he's all girly and weird for wearing the shirt. in the vortex in my head's words, "it's great! If i show up in makeup and en femme I don't even have to call him a slur, he does that to himself and then gets mad at me for it! Then I can sic Onslaught on him"
- onslaught does not want to be sicced on him
- onslaught is Tired^TM
- this is because Vortex has been intentionally manufacturing situations wherein Onslaught needs to get involved as mandated by some rule or another all week because Vortex is mad that Onslaught used his dish towel or something
- Motormaster's sword was supposed to be in his lap but I forgot about it
- drag strip also hashtag genderqueer icon i GUESS but i think drag strip's gender is actually "flashy" and his presentation is "sparkly with a side of leather". ask him for a gender and he'll tell you "peacock" or possibly "sexy". he uses he/him pronouns if you start it but if you call her she/her pronouns she won't comment either so your guess is as good as mine (and i mean that in the most honorrary sense, we love a "gender: center of attention" mf in this household, wish i could commit to THAT bit)
- breakdown has not seen the sun in six years and would like to keep that record going

also bonus MotorMADster

Comments

[sexytronians]

Each time I've seen this today I still laugh my arse off.

Drag Strip has heelie wheels in those shoes. Consequently, he eats shit every time he tries to walk anywhere. He will not change shoes.

I love this lol. But also all the Stunticons seem to have cool shoes. I just noticed one of Motormaster's laces is undone and I can't help but think that happens a lot but he wears them because they look Cool. Breakdown is trying to be noticed as little as possible in his outfit but also still has the cool shoes.

Motormaster's sword was supposed to be in his lap but I forgot about it

I think if it was it would be pointing at Vortex very quickly and also the idea that in a human verse Megatron saw this very angry young lad and went 'here you have a sword' is very funny to me. He is the last person who should have a big pointy bit of metal to wave at people.

Admittedly, most of the Decepticons are people who should not have access to high powered weaponry but do.


Blast Off is somewhere in the distance staring at Onslaught like he's seen something particularly disagreeable on the bottom of his foot. Everyone around him is edging away convinced he's about to start swinging. This is Blast Off's "genuinely stricken with lovestruck affection" face. he has no idea it looks like this
I love this. Its so funny.

Edit. I would use blockquotes rather than italics but I keep getting a missing message thing come up. Weird.

[redthedragon]

All the other stunticons wear fancy tactical shoes- I based Motormaster's off a pair I found on an army surplus site and Breakdown's off the locking mechanism on a pair of roller blades I had years ago. I figured that was fitting for both of them.
Drag Strip has tactical shoes, he's just not wearing them because Wheelie Heelies.
I figured Motormaster probably doesn't know how to tie a nice knot, and that's why his laces are like that, but I also love the idea that he thinks it's cool to not tie his shoes. he would.

Motormaster is avoiding going up and JUST hitting Vortex because technically Vortex didn't do anything, his CO is right there, it would cause problems for both of them, and Motormaster doesn't need to be marched in front of Megatron alongside Onslaught to explain why he's misbehaving in public. Or else the sword would be already through one of Vortex's somewhat more auxiliary limbs.

i promise at all times i am making fun of all of the decepticon combiners, they make it so easy. [smacks blast off on the top of the head] this guy can fit so many Bad At Feelings in him

[sexytronians]

Ah cool!

Lol. He would just look very angry for the whole meeting, that feels like a Motormaster thing.

I am doing the same. They are so fun it is great. I get much ‘bad at feelings’ mileage out of the robots who turn into bigger into robots too. It is very fun.

[sexytronians]

Okay just incase you wanna know about the blockquote thing. Tracked it to this line of css associated with the blockquote selector. The image that should be linked via that url doesn't exist, hence Dreamwidth going 'the image is missing'.

background: #000000 url("https://imgur.com/https://i.imgur.com/https://i.imgur.com/4xaHvXB.png.png") no-repeat 10px 15px;

[redthedragon]

oh that's interesting- i've noticed the issue appearing but just basically ignored it myself

[your_exalted_grace]

I remember reading this post about a month ago or so before joining Dreamwidth and I still love these headcanons and character designs as always. Blast Off being mentioned is making me engaged as I would love to see how you'll portray him (and Brawl too!). Also these drawings are what inspired me into picking up humanformers again (I used to draw them a lot ever since I joined the fandom back in 2019)!